Wolfe Bite Chapter 17

By Captain Gaul

“You’re under arrest for two charges of conspiracy to commit murder, and numerous other related charges. Your rights will be read to you once you are in custody.”

“Ja, uh-huh. You weren’t so interested in reading my rights the last time we met.”

“Which was when?”

“I guess you can’t remember everybody you brutalize, huh, you pig?!”

“Not really.”

“Fine. My name is Wolfe. The girl you’re holding in handcuffs is Serena. The blond kid you had brutalized at Fiona’s Forest was Hans. The guy Crono fried was Jose. Do any of these names ring a bell?”


“Criminy. I’m trying to take revenge, and you don’t even know who I am. Fine. We were Tom’s companions, back after Guardia. After you killed Tom, we feigned death until you left. We managed to make it to Zeal, and pretty soon I linked up with others you wanted you dead, and some who had never seen you but were willing to cooperate. Lucky thing I went with Jose when we knocked off Crono, or nothing could’ve come of it.”

“And all of this was to kill me? You pulled all this to get to ME? I’m flattered, honestly--” Suddenly, Gaul kicked Wolfe in a very sensitive spot, knocked him to the ground, and proceeded to handcuff him. “—punk.”

Wolfe growled. Hair grew from his face, and the handcuffs burst open. He lashed out with a now-clawed foot and knocked Gaul backwards. “When Devon tried to summon Ultimate Power and got a demon instead, who got the ultimate power? Not Yakra. Me! Ultimate power is MINE! MWA-HA-HA-hurk!” He stared down at the dart sticking out of his chest, then looked up thoughtfully.

“That hurt, I’ll grant you that.” The evil, twisted rage returned to his face. “But it won’t be enough!” He crushed the dart with one hand and threw it to the ground. “And now you die!”

Gaul deflected the were-Wolfe’s charge with the riot shield. Wolfe clang to it, gnawing it. Gaul swung the club around and smashed Wolfe’s back. The angry creature lashed its hand out to claw into Gaul’s armor—and got caught in the jaws of Moe’s battlewrench. The creature screamed in pain as Moe hit the valve and the wrench crushed Wolfe’s right hand/paw into a bloody pulp.

Chi leveled a pistol, trying to get a clear shot at Wolfe. Suddenly, she felt a terrible pain in her ankle, and looked down and back to see Serena was biting into it with fangs such as usually seen on snakes. Serena’s handcuffs burst, and she jumped to her feet, looking considerably uglier and much more muscular than she had when she answered the door. Chi fired the auto-pistol at her. She didn’t even flinch.

Wolfe poked his head over the top of the shield to growl at Gaul. The captain smashed the creature’s face with the battleclub. The sheer force actually tore the shield from the straps that held it to Gaul’s arm. The shield landed, with Wolfe attached, on the floor some feet away. Wolfe made a three-legged charge towards Gaul, who pumped the full load of riot gas at it.

“Help!” Chi cried as Serena crushed her claws into Chi’s arm. Chi managed to slide a six-inch blade into the creature’s ribs, and pulled it across her back, but the Serena hardly seemed to notice. The creature kicked again, and Chi was on the ground. Serena reared up for one last strike…then paused. She turned her head one hundred and eighty degrees, and realized, very slowly, that the jaws of Moe’s battlewrench were around her head.

“Bitch.” Moe said as he hit the valve. Serena considered moving, but by the time the thought crossed the necessary synapses, her head, skull, and brain were a single messy blob of goo.

Gaul shouted as Wolfe jumped on top of him, clawing and biting. The riot armor was starting to falter in places. Chi stood up, drew both of her pistols, and fired almost two full clips—thirteen shots—into Wolfe. The only noticeable effect was that the creature whimpered and scampered away from them.

“Alright!” He growled. “I don’t need this anymore.” A light flashed, and he stood a oversized, impressive-looking man. "Care to worship me?"

“Deus help you, you moron.”

“Deus?! Who needs Deus? I AM A GOD!”

“Blasphemous fool.” Gaul drew the rifle and fired twelve of the darts into Wolfe.


“You know…” Gaul looked back at Moe and Chi, who were stepping forward to assist. “I just love these quests and wars that end in cataclysmic battles, don’t you?” They nodded cynically and stepped up next to him. “Well, Wolfe, if you’re going to turn this little conspiracy into an attempt at godhood, I’ve got two words for you: Bring it.”


Chapter 18

Crossover Fanfics