Fight the Fanfic Chapter 4

First Battle and Reinforcements

By Captain Gaul

The gate opened, and Tom, Devon, and Frank stepped out. Tom noted the blood all over the fairgrounds with disgust, but Frank and Devon told him to forget it. Walking through the town like a trio of desperadoes, they concentrated very hard on looking tough but couldn’t figure out what to do.

After a couple of hours of this, word of the strange strangers reached King Guardia. He dispatched a messenger to them at once, hoping to learn of their origin, and if perhaps these were the men Captain Gaul was seeking.

The trio grew very nervous as the uniformed man approached them. Tom actually jumped when the messenger talked to them. “Sirs, I’m from King Guardia. I’d—” Tom panicked and smashed his scepter into the man’s head. Blood flowed from his forehead, and he slumped to the ground. They looked around nervously, and noticed the other patrons of the tavern were all staring at them. They panicked again, and fled the scene.

An hour later, a villager came to King Guardia with word that his messenger had been killed by the visitors. Furious, King Guardia decreed that the trio should die, and ordered his soldiers to go en masse, find them, and kill them. No one argued.

Another half hour later, the trio was accosted by a force some hundred strong at the entrance of Guardia forest; seconds later combat had broken out.

The Guardian soldiers never really stood a chance. Their weapons couldn’t touch Frank, and Devon and Tom were standing towards the back of the action, where their magic would be more effective. Dozens of troops were falling to Frank’s blade, and even more to the deadly magic. Only twelve remained when Captain Gaul showed up, flanked by Chi and Moe.

“Get out of our universe, bozos.”

“You! You’re the one who keeps killing us!”

“Oh, yeah. That was real realistic dialogue.” Moe quipped. “What’s next? ‘I’m not afraid if you want to go on home?’ ‘You idiot I’m wearing a tie’? ‘All your base are belong to us?’ Do you have anything to say that sounds like English?”

“Shut up!” And with that Frank leapt into the air, swinging his sword backwards for a big hit. Moe shot off one of his battlewrenchs, and while Frank suffered no serious damage, the force of the wrench knocked him to the ground, where he lied panting and heaving.

Devon and Tom began their gestures for a few powerful spells, when Chi screamed at the top of her lungs. Any chants the two might have made were stopped at once, as the two fell to the ground, clutching their ears in a vain attempt to muffle the sound. The soldiers, at once sensing their opportunity, attacked them, beating on them with everything they had.

But eventually, Chi had to stop and take a breath. Devon took his chance and finished the incantation, and huge crystal of ice fell from the sky onto the soldiers. Tom lashed out with his scepter and punched a soldier with his heavy ruby ring. Frank climbed to his feet, and as Captain Gaul drew a pistol to take Devon down, Tom made one further incantation. The trio disappeared into thin air.

The remaining combatants heaved a heavy sigh and limped back to their places of origin.

* * *

Just a couple hundred yards away, in a small glen in the middle of Guardia Forest, Devon, Frank, and Tom were trying to recuperate from the confrontation. Tom whined as he rubbed his head.

“Damn, that chick can scream! I thought my eardrums were gonna pop!”

Devon was making moans to a similar effect when Frank slapped both of them. “Guys, I don’t know if you realized this, but…this wasn’t good! Our first battle shouldn’t have been so close!”

“He’s right…we need a plan. How ‘bout we storm the castle?”

* * *

Back in his headquarters, Gaul pondered this particular exchange. “I wonder…if their dialogue is really this bizarre, their logic really this broken? Or is this just the lack of talent talking? One has to wonder if Ritalin might help….”

* * *

“Dude, we can’t storm the castle now! The three of us? We nearly got wasted last time, and that was in the middle of nowhere. We need reinforcements!”

Tom grinned. “I’ve got a plan….”

Before long, they had drawn a hexagram—“Shouldn’t it have been a pentagram?” “Five sides…six sides…who cares?”—and Tom and Devon started to plan the spell. Frank couldn’t really do much, so he wandered off into the woods to slaughter a few innocent bunny rabbits.

When he stumbled back into the glen, having discovered why they’re called ‘RaBites’, Frank noticed that about thirty extra people were there. He wandered over to Tom, who was demonstrating the proper (totally wrong) way to swing the sword.

He leaned in and whispered. “Tom? What the heck is our class doing here?”

“We needed reinforcements, so I just summoned up all our classmates. We’re teaching them to fight. Here, spar off with James.”

* * *

“Sir? Are you okay?”

“This is just fine and dandy, ya know? It was three new characters…now it’s thirty-three. Things are looking grim.”

“But sir, I’ve gotten a hold of their character stats. Most of them have powers and stats within the original CT parameters.”

“What end of the scale?”

“Er…about on par with the Lavos Core. But still, they’re not indestructible, like the first three.”

* * *

A few hours later, the troops were formed up, and the thirty-three marched out of the woods and to the Guardia Castle gates.


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