No Wish To Be Alone Chapter 13
The Planet's Turn To Explain
By Chocobo Goddess
Soft music played somewhere in the background as they stared at each other. He had a very strange expression on his face. "Love?"
"Yes?"
"How did we get here?"
She chewed on her bottom lip, trying to think of a good explanation in ten words or less. "Well, you see, we’re Inside."
"I know where we are. I want to know how you got here." Frankly, how did I get here? I was kissing her…
It was her turn to look confused. "You’ve been here before?"
"Of course. This is where I contemplate things when I’m meditating." He peered at her. "You’ve been here before, too?"
"This is Inside. It’s where I go sometimes when I need to talk to the Planet without interruption. I was here last night, before AVALANCHE showed up."
"How can you get inside my inner mind?"
"What are you talking about? This is MY inner mind!" She glanced around. A few yards away, she saw the representations of their physical forms as she had the previous night. They were locked in a passionate kiss, unmoving, like statues. This time, however, there was only one image above the two of them; the mirror image of her in the blue void, with him standing behind her. She spun back to face him, to find that he had moved forward a few steps as she did. She nearly collided with his chest, but he caught her before she could fall from surprise. "What’s going on?" she asked, then realized something. "PLANET?"
Here.
She switched to thought. Is this your doing?
Of course. Brought you here together. The music grew and faded, the mellow tones of a lute this time. The blue glowed and dimmed in time to the sound.
"Wait—that’s the Planet’s voice?" he said weakly. Alarmed, she helped him sit down, for all colour had drained from his face. "It doesn’t make sense."
"What doesn’t?"
"I always thought it was mine."
She looked nonplussed. "You’ve heard the Planet before? How? Here?"
Imperceptibly, he nodded. "I would argue things over with myself in here. Though I always assumed it was my own mind, playing devil’s advocate or something..."
Amusement drifted over them both. Should never assume, silly man.
"I’ll remember that in the future." He shook his head, dazed. I can hear the Planet?
Where are we, dear Friend?
Inside. You recognize Inside. Here often enough.
But Inside whom? Him? Me?
Inside ME.
They both froze. The Planet’s voice, gaining strength, as though more and more voices were joining a chorus, continued.
Always Inside ME. Brought you here for safety, sanity. Safe place. Any more fear, pain, separation, can come here to find each other. Created bond as lifeline. Where one goes, other may follow. The notes flurried, the Planet’s own form of rueful laughter. In the unmoving forms before them, the golden auras shimmered, highlighting the tenuous Bond. Never came here together. Never same time. Always alone, always lonely. Too far apart. Not enough love, obstacles, Not-My-Child interfering, not enough knowledge to follow each other. The voice sounded pleased. Now never too far apart. Soon, perhaps permanent.
"Permanent?" the man’s normally clear voice was hushed. He touched his beloved’s face. "Permanent how?" He addressed the Planet, but never took his eyes from hers.
Love. Bond. Oath. Vow. Must speak with her, play can wait. Need to discuss plans first. Need to make decisions. No secrets. No more waiting. Then, play. Love. Plans first.
The two stared at each other. Finally, the girl spoke aloud. "We should get back, then. I’d rather talk about this in person."
He nodded in silent agreement, already making his decisions in his mind. They both closed their eyes, concentrated on their entwined bodies under the willow, and suddenly, they were there. He did not release her right away, instead plundering her mouth for just a moment more. When he did pull back, she whimpered at the look in his eyes.
Oh, gods, he’s angry at me, he must think I tricked him into this or something. She closed her eyes as he sat up, turning her head to the side so he wouldn’t see them filling up with tears for the hundredth time that night. She managed to get herself under control, and she, too slowly got into a sitting position.
He pulled a blade of grass from the ground, inspecting it carefully. His expressionless visage gave nothing away. She could see the faint glow of green lighting his cheekbones from his half-closed eyes. Then that solemn gaze was turned upon her fully, the General looking over a raw recruit, missing nothing. She jumped when he spoke.
"We will deal with the issues of Inside and why I can hear the Planet later. Right now, I want you to tell me what the Planet was talking about regarding this Bond. From the beginning."
"O—okay…the beginning?"
"When I abducted you."
She hesitated, then began, the words coming out in a rush. "It started when I asked the Planet why I hadn’t been killed. It told me I was the last of my kind, and if I died, it would have no one Hear it anymore. When I asked what it would do when I died of old age, it told me it would talk to my children. I was shocked! I had never planned on having any children, since I thought my life was going to end so early. I couldn’t think of anyone I knew who I’d even consider as a father, since I didn’t love Cloud like that, nor any of the members of AVALANCHE. And they were the only people I knew. Then, you touched my arm and the Planet began sending me images and feelings about you. I thought, dear Gods, it can’t be him! But the Planet had already chosen for me." She paused, hoping he didn’t hate her for not telling him this sooner.
"Go on," he said, face still unreadable.
"Then you kissed me at the inn, and you had carried me there, and I started to realize that you were the man I’d dreamed about, not the evil monster, but the burdened, sorrowful man. I fell in love with you. Yesterday, you asked me about how the Planet had saved you, and I found out by looking Inside last night. It showed me the Bond, and told me how to keep it intact. Love, it said, would strengthen it, but only temporarily. To make it permanent—," her voice dropped to a near whisper, "I would have to marry you. That’s what it meant by ‘oath’ and ‘vow’. A marriage vow is a public promise, legally and spiritually binding."
"And where does that leave us?" he asked softly. "Has all this been decided for us? Do you have any say in this?" He leaned forward, cupping her chin in his hand. "Do I?"
She wanted to hide from the flaring intensity in his Mako eyes. "There’s always a choice, love. The Planet has told me what it wants to happen, but you make your decisions on your own."
He continued his perusal of her face for a while. "And if I decide not to marry you?"
Fresh tears sprang to her eyes. "I—I would not force you to do anything."
"What about children? What if I don’t ever want any, because I would never want another child to endure what I went through?" His voice was still soft, calm, detached.
"Again, that is your choice." She pulled away from his hand, dropping her gaze to her lap as a few tears escaped, darkening the fabric of her dress where they fell. "Though I cannot lie; my heart was overjoyed when I was given back the chance to have a family."
"What would you do if I decided to have no part in the Planet’s plans? What if I decide to leave?"
Her breath choked her. "Then the Planet would have to admit that you were the wrong choice. If I want those things, and I do, I would eventually have to look for someone else to marry…"
"NO!" His cry frightened her, so sudden and so vehement. Her eyes snapped back up to meet his. "I will never allow another man to touch you! You are mine, Aeris!" His hands went to her shoulders, pulling her unresisting form into a fierce embrace.
"I don’t understand! I thought you said…those questions you asked…," She was utterly confused, but her heart was growing lighter.
"Love, I meant it when I said I needed you. I was asking those questions because I wanted to know if I at least had a choice. I never said I wouldn’t follow the very attractive path the Planet opened up for me. I need you, love, and I will marry you. But only if that is what you wish, not what some manipulative entity tells you it wants." No offense, he thought to the entity in question.
None taken, came the unexpected reply, with a hint of amusement.
The girl gave him no time to reflect upon that, for she threw her arms about his neck, kissing him soundly. "Yes! I want that, and yes, it’s my decision. When this all started, I mightn't have been so sure, but I’ve had time to learn who you are." She smiled up at him, holding him tightly, tight enough so he couldn’t escape.
He smiled. "Then let’s get some sleep. Tomorrow, we make plans with AVALANCHE. I’ll let you decide what to tell them."
"Let’s not tell them yet. I still need them to get used to you being on our side, so we’ll keep it quiet for now. But the first cleric we run across…," she sighed happily.
"The very first one we find will marry us." He grinned at the prospect. "Come on, let’s sit in our favorite spot. I want to hold you under this tree one last time before we leave."
*****
AN: Hmm, let me know what you think of this chapter. It was difficult to write, since I had a hard time envisioning the whole marriage proposal part. If you don't like it, maybe I'll rewrite it later. *wark*